Am I Prepared For What Happens Next?įinally, it's important to ask yourself one more thing: Are you ready for anything that may come from this discussion? It'll help make sure you get a chance to verbalize what's right for you. You'll come out feeling like you didn't really get a say at all, without having expressed any feelings or sentiments.īefore you go into any serious relationship talk, make sure you know what you want first. If you don't even have an idea of what you want before you start the "what are we" conversation, it's likely that your partner's thoughts and desires will take lead the whole way. Instead, give it whatever time you need to first decide what you really want.Īre you only doing this for them? If you don't want something serious yet, is it a good idea to get into a conversation in which your partner could decide on something you don't have much interest in?
While it may be tempting to figure this out in order to get your partner to decide where things are going, avoid the pull to do so. Do I Know What I Actually Want?īefore you pin your partner down for a serious talking to, ask yourself whether you're sure about what you're looking for. Just be clear about your reasons and make sure they are the right ones. If a huge change is happening for you that you'd like to include them in, but you aren't yet sure about the bounds of your relationship, it's best to sit down and talk about it. If you're facing a big life change, like a new job or a move to a new city, those are both good reasons to bring this up this question to your partner.
In fact, thinking of how things'll look in the long-term is likely one of the best possible reasons to sit down and figure out what you are before it gets too late. If the two of you spend a lot of time together, but you are starting to wonder if you can reasonably include them in your life down the road, then now would be a good time to have the talk. Often, if things are going along well in your relationship, it's natural to start thinking about the future.
The first question you need to ask yourself before you decide to have "the talk" is probably the most important: W hy is now the time for this discussion?